it's me, hi
Cue the Taylor*…jk, I’m not a problem.
So, hi everyone! I’m starting this thing and like anything, it all starts with hello. I could write about the ways to craft a well-thought out version of a hello, but I’m not going to do that. Instead, I’m going to tell you to keep it simple and just say hello for once. I know a lot of people are strongly against a simple hello as an opener. Some say it’s lazy. It’s boring. It’s just not that creative. Well, I disagree. I think it’s a way to open conversation no matter how you look at it.
Hot take: simple hellos are okay
I’ve opened with so many creative openers in my day. From noticing the small details in a photo and asking if the dude also waited in line for hand-made udon in Japan during cherry blossom season to complimenting another guy’s sick air-guitar skills at my gym, I find conversation starters in anything and everything. Being creative on the fly could be fun, but when you do it a lot, it can get exhausting–especially when there’s no response. The creative opener burnout is real. And that’s the thing about dating too, once you feel like you’ve shared something special, opened yourself up to talking to someone, or just put your best foot forward and ::took a chance::–you just feel butthurt when it’s not reciprocated. It sucks. That’s why I’m telling you to give hellos a chance. They, like you, are probably burnt out from all the trying. Yet here we are still looking for looking for that connection–whether it be for a night or a lifetime. Plus, when you meet someone IRL, do you really open with one of those really annoying prompts you commonly see on the apps? You’re probably not asking for two truths and a lie right out the gate; but rather, you’re probably saying some form of hi. Simple.
Okay, so here’s what you’re going to do: You’re going to respond to that hello. You, my friend, are going to find something in their profile or tell them something you want to share with this newfound person that you probably think that’s cute (remember, you also swiped on them?). It takes two to tango, erm…conversate, and so often we blame the other person for being the boring one. Have you ever thought it could be you too? JK, you’re great–you are reading this! Depending how they respond, that’s when you could make a fair assessment of whether or not they’re worth spending your precious minutes talking to. They say a little effort goes a long way and I think this applies with simple hellos too. Try it out.
Anyways, that’s my long winded way to say hello! I don’t know what this will be yet. Stories, unsolicited advice, mixtapes, you name it. “‘I don’t know where I’m going, but I promise it won’t be boring; David Bowie’” –me.
xoxo,
c
*P.S. surprise, I’m actually not the biggest Swiftie
But here’s my favorite song of the week: Bits by Varsity